Saturday, May 7, 2011

My knee hurts and I'm pretty sure theres footage of me peeing on things in public. Blast me and my debauchery.

That being said, I do believe that may days off are shifting. I pray that avkjbvavb kvb abbjknkl Orson Welles sd fvvabnvnv auih  giggity.

~Xavier R.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

My 10 least favorite things Pt. 2

5. Steven Tyler

Aerosmith wasn't the greatest band that ever existed, but even after they sobered up and got old, they still were shining beacons of rock n roll prowess, success, and all around awesomeness, roots deep in origins of hard work and genuine musical effort. Big headed lead singer here, left to go head up a group of judges on a fickle minded shallow machine that pops out "musicians" of the same ilk as said machine. Well done, you treasonous backstabbing piece of shit. Well done.

4. People who go against everyone else does.

Read a book. I bet no one does that. Then you'd be hip.
Their first album was the best, right? Wrong. They were shittier musicians back then. Just shut the fuck up. When all is said and done, all your friends will rid themselves of shame for liking things that aren't filth, and you'll be alone, living in your mom's basement listening to Pablo Honey on repeat and watching Donnie Darko.

3. My Mom's idea of God

My mom loves me. If I lived in a town with a bunch of hedons, I betchya billions she wouldn't drop fireballs on top our heads, even after several warnings. So this fire tossing, tower of unity destroying maniac loves me? Then does mommy dearest...super love me?

2. Nickelback

Take the worst parts of country (yes, a bad thing can be even worse) and mix it with the worst parts of rock (say it aint so) and add in mediocre pop sensibilities, and you have this shitty band. If you haven't ever listened to them, continue down that path. Let this merely be yet another warning to stay away.

OK, a shitty band, but why so high on the list? Even past killer robots and mayonnaise? Because the suck THAT FUCKING MUCH.

1. American's who hate America

I have no picture for this.

I'm sick of these mother fuckers jumping on the bandwagon when they have no idea what they're talking about. All soldiers are murderers they say, just hired thugs for a corrupt government. The same government that cares nothing for it's people. Idiots.

Big Mike and I have our disagreements with government. You have to understand, though, that ideally, this country is the greatest in all the world. You also need to remember, that this is one of the few havens on the planet where you can speak your mind, and not be murdered in the street for it. Of course when you try to usurp the ruling body, they wont like that. That is to be expected.

The misdeeds of American soldiers, and the corruption and weakness that is our government has been mentioned several times on this site. That doesn't mean that we hate either. The opposite, in fact. We love our freedoms that are afford to us, and know that without the hard working soldiers that REALLY DO keep us safe, we would be conquered, no doubt.

We just understand the difference between pointing out flaws, and trying to get to the world to realize we aren't all the brick headed buffoons many of our fore-running politicians are, and that we care about our image, as opposed to screaming "Huzzah! That damn building blower upper sand nigger is done finally did in!"

So before you stare at the t.v, giving into all the bullshit that everyone else does, trusting your far leftist bullshit, which is equally corrupt, and rotting your teeth further as you take advantage of the many things afforded to you, probably for free, thank someone, anyone, for being able to be safe in this country. And try blaming yourself for a problem. Because if you can't get off your ass and stir up a raucous over something that you believe if truly wrong...

Everything wrong in this country is your fault. 

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

My 10 least favorite things Pt. 1

Hello again. My new keyboard has finally arrived, in timing of recuperated fervor. So, onto the list.

10. Ex Girlfriends

Seeing as how I wouldn't post a picture of an actual ex-girlfriend, this only seemed fitting.

You see, I always considered myself to be, above most else, a very nice guy. So I figure that the reasons for being stepped on, is former weight problems (which are still present but diminishing) or mental...oddities. Either reason not a reason for cruelty. So if you couldn't hang, tell me, and stop hanging. No reason to rip my heart out. I can be an asshole, but never when uncultivated to do so.

9. Sluts

I don't mean someone who has a bunch of sex, even with lots of different people. That's just being promiscuous (to me at least). I view a slut as a person who doesn't truly hold their-self in any sort of regard, has no standards for a partner other than shallow ones, and dresses in a disgusting manner to attract something that should be beautiful, even if it's frequent.

8. Hippies

I think there are people who view themselves as hippies, just because they believe in peace and unity and all that whatnotness. That's totally cool. They aren't hippies, though. A hippie is a dirty, self outcasted lazy bum who choses peace for the lust of inaction and free things, wanting wealth to be shared, as in have others do real work for them. Shame on them.

7. Robots that think on a personal level

Human creativity extends to all reaches of possibility. Instead of giving indestructible potential killing machines self conscious thought in a world they come into as inferior socially, bonded to their masters as a slave forever, (hello grudge turns into human destruction?) we should focus on curing cancer, or finding a unified theory for quantum mechanics.

6. Mayonnaise 

It is beyond cavernously disgusting, horrible for you, and looks like a dude's cum, which I never want in my mouth. Plus, I'm allergic to it, meaning not only is it bad for me in all ways, but it would kill me, even if everyone where to tell me I was exaggerating on all the other levels.

In mid type, I realized I need sleep before I die. So ponder, if you will, my top five least favorite things. If you guess them all right, well, you win nothing. Get some exercise.

~Xavier R.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Serious Shit: Osama is dead (and why that doesn't matter one good god damn)


Osama Bin Laden, I'm told, was shot in the face in some shitty rat-hole in Afghanistan last night by Navy Seals. While this is all well and good (what else were seals going to do when they found him?) what really bugs me is the reaction I'm seeing. As our friend and yours, Brandon Gilbert, put it:
I can't celebrate the death of another human no matter how despicable, not to say I'm not happy about it just not "happy" about it.
So he's dead. So fucking what? We've killed a man whose been hiding in caves for the last ten years.

Let me put this into perspective for you flag-waving morons. We've spent over 1 trillion dollars (and counting) on war since 2001. We've wasted over 900 thousand Afghan, Iraqi and American lives (300 times more then those killed in 9/11) and we've been the biggest boon to Al-Qaida recruiters world wide, and what the fuck do we have to show for it? We killed the guy who planned 9/11.

Do you feel better now America? Now that you've pinned these two countries down with no army, no navy and no air-force and you raped them until they couldn't scream or cry or even bleed any more? Now that you blew your load out of your gun shaped cock? Now will you finally just pull it out, wipe your dick off on their thigh and leave them alone in the ditch?

Or are you just going to reload and rape them again?

These people, these people who are so "happy" Osama Bin Laden is dead make me angry not because they feel a sense of closure or even justice, but how short sighted they are to how truly barbaric, wasteful and counter-productive this so called "justice" really is.

I'll leave you alone, but first I want you to see this video and then you will feel somewhat as I do. If you don't, I have no faith in you, and I sincerely hope you die.

Not sorry he pissed on your fucking parade.

Big Mike.